Diabetes victory of the week: My Dexcom numbers look pretty good, and by that, I mean pretty low. I’m happy with them. I’ve consistently aimed for 60-90 fasting blood sugar and below 130 for two hours postprandial, per what I’ve been told by two different MFMs, and I feel pretty good about where I am.
Diabetes failure of the week: My endocrinologist does not think my numbers look good because he thinks they are too low. He tried to scare me with the possibility of neurological defects in the baby and maternal hypoglycemic unawareness, and it took me a few days thinking about it before I could say, “BS.” My blood sugars are not substantially different than they were in other pregnancies, and you babies are pretty smart. So what if they could have had a few extra IQ points? At least they aren’t missing a critical organ. Also, I know what my blood sugar is all the time because of my sensor, so I’m really not missing any important lows.
Mostly unfounded fear of the week: That my endocrinologist will fire me (again). This was apparently a pretty traumatic even the last time it happened, and I haven’t fully been able to appreciate that until three pregnancies later... This fear is actually demonstrably unfounded because he’s already said he’s turning over my care to the maternal fetal specialist until the end of pregnancy. So I’m a sense he’s already fired me for the rest of my pregnancy, which makes it less scary? Actually, it’s just less personal, because I know he didn’t do it in anger.
Mostly intangible joy of the week: Feeling the little one start moving. I know it’s kinda early, but I always feel it this soon. It’s like a teeny tiny finger tap on the inside a few inches below my below button, and it’s so great to know he’s alive and (actually) kicking!
Diabetes failure of the week: My endocrinologist does not think my numbers look good because he thinks they are too low. He tried to scare me with the possibility of neurological defects in the baby and maternal hypoglycemic unawareness, and it took me a few days thinking about it before I could say, “BS.” My blood sugars are not substantially different than they were in other pregnancies, and you babies are pretty smart. So what if they could have had a few extra IQ points? At least they aren’t missing a critical organ. Also, I know what my blood sugar is all the time because of my sensor, so I’m really not missing any important lows.
Mostly unfounded fear of the week: That my endocrinologist will fire me (again). This was apparently a pretty traumatic even the last time it happened, and I haven’t fully been able to appreciate that until three pregnancies later... This fear is actually demonstrably unfounded because he’s already said he’s turning over my care to the maternal fetal specialist until the end of pregnancy. So I’m a sense he’s already fired me for the rest of my pregnancy, which makes it less scary? Actually, it’s just less personal, because I know he didn’t do it in anger.
Mostly intangible joy of the week: Feeling the little one start moving. I know it’s kinda early, but I always feel it this soon. It’s like a teeny tiny finger tap on the inside a few inches below my below button, and it’s so great to know he’s alive and (actually) kicking!