I have been incommunicado, but I am STILL PREGNANT! I have passed every due date given to me, and stand now at 40w1d according to the very latest due date I could have possibly given myself, based on the ovulation predictions of a fertility monitor. According to the 20 week ultrasound due date, I am 40w3d. I blew past the last menstrual period due date a while ago. I'd stand at 41w4d if we went by that one, but we always knew that ovulation doesn't always occur on day 14 of the menstrual cycle, right?
Diabetic victory of the (last three) week(s): I can't remember the last time my blood sugar went above 160 mg/dL.
Diabetic failure of the (last three) week(s): I had a terrible nighttime low that really frightened my husband. The CGM normally prevents these, but I was in the two hour warm up phase when I fell asleep, and didn't wake up when the alert sounded to calibrate. I wasn't violent. In fact, I was endearingly attempting to cooperate by carefully placing the tip of my finger IN the Gatorade bottle so that my husband could check my blood sugar with it. He finally managed to convince me to drink the Gatorade by asking if I would be willing to drink what was in the shoe. It was a sweaty, middle-of-the-night, once-every-three-years kind of low that the CGM largely helps me to prevent, but it was still scary. I especially worried about the baby, but she is still alive and, as I write, kicking. Me. In the belly.
Mostly unfounded anxiety of the (last three) week(s): That she will be too big for me to deliver.
Most intangible joy of the (last three) week(s): I think my doctor finally recognizes me when I come in, and what's more, he is totally an utterly relaxed about all this. He did not mention induction at 38 or 39 weeks, and *I* was the one who had to remind him that I will be 41 weeks on Friday, and doesn't he want to schedule the induction now? I am still waiting to hear from the hospital about that, but basically just hoping to go into labor spontaneously. Yes, I've triedallthe things except castor oil, because I don't want to be dehydrated when I actually do go into labor. Considering black and blue cohosh tincture some time this week.
Diabetic victory of the (last three) week(s): I can't remember the last time my blood sugar went above 160 mg/dL.
Diabetic failure of the (last three) week(s): I had a terrible nighttime low that really frightened my husband. The CGM normally prevents these, but I was in the two hour warm up phase when I fell asleep, and didn't wake up when the alert sounded to calibrate. I wasn't violent. In fact, I was endearingly attempting to cooperate by carefully placing the tip of my finger IN the Gatorade bottle so that my husband could check my blood sugar with it. He finally managed to convince me to drink the Gatorade by asking if I would be willing to drink what was in the shoe. It was a sweaty, middle-of-the-night, once-every-three-years kind of low that the CGM largely helps me to prevent, but it was still scary. I especially worried about the baby, but she is still alive and, as I write, kicking. Me. In the belly.
Mostly unfounded anxiety of the (last three) week(s): That she will be too big for me to deliver.
Most intangible joy of the (last three) week(s): I think my doctor finally recognizes me when I come in, and what's more, he is totally an utterly relaxed about all this. He did not mention induction at 38 or 39 weeks, and *I* was the one who had to remind him that I will be 41 weeks on Friday, and doesn't he want to schedule the induction now? I am still waiting to hear from the hospital about that, but basically just hoping to go into labor spontaneously. Yes, I've triedallthe things except castor oil, because I don't want to be dehydrated when I actually do go into labor. Considering black and blue cohosh tincture some time this week.
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Another significant consolation to me during this time is that my baby is happy where she is. For too long, I have suffered the fear that because I am a diabetic, my body is dangerous for my babies, that they will die if they stay in too long, that I am not able to give them what they need. This might be true in part and some of the time, but let's be honest. Babies sometimes die when they come out, too, and as all moms do, I struggle to meet their needs after birth as well. So it's not as though the situation changes all that much once the baby comes out. This pregnancy has been marked by the conviction and satisfaction that my body is enough for my baby. It has been a relatively "comfortable" pregnancy, quite healthy, and I am looking forward to delivery. (Soon. I mean, it's not that comfortable).
I hope the next news you hear from me involves a fair amount of blood, no guts, and some very deep breaths from at least two of us. :)